reunion with my blog

just say that i’m cruel because after around six months i’m revisiting my blog le…there are many situations or events to write about but then i just lost myself and i have no mood to write anything special that are worth immortalized by this blog…but today just this morning i had a dream that was so special and memorable, a happy one that i really wanna jot it down here le…as a reference for myself so that i can laugh again when i read this silly post here in future…i’m actually studying for tomolo’s mc100 quiz but then it’s just too borin le

many things had happened just a time line what had happened in a glance then; well where do i stop ??? let me recheck first…it was march 28, 2008…okie

dec 2007 - april 2008 - working as admin assistant for maxis

may 2008 - now - started my psychology course in HELP and found myself simply crushing on ppl again, here goes my weird behaviour….adui..

okie this is the one , the main thing now, i plan to forget bout him after so many cold replies and shoulders(do i even use the right word for this) from him , well it is sorta my fault also….my ” chickened out” attitude…so after much consultation and advice from my dear friend, she asked me to just forget bout him, it was indeed a good one and therefore all kinds and ways of communicating with him has been blocked by me.dun wanna torture myself no more…so yestermorning i had this dream that i wanna dream on and just dun wanna wake up le…it’s something like well i’m with him finally and we were driving…(awwww …so sweet, yup in fantasy ) and also finally getting approval from my dad…good rite this kinda dream…most of these nights i have been dreaming for no reasons i guessed…perhaps it is because of stress ??? but i’m always a stress-free girl..now that i’m having a running nose…maybe my body is producing stress without the signals from my brain and neurons le…..

better go and have a body check up…

yup and one more thing, through this 6 months i have ” fatt fook” alot le..thanks to maxis broadband staff especially operations team for giving me a chance to work travel to johore and penang especially where the food hails and eventually into my stomach each night after we finish our pc fair…besides we also get to party and celebrate a lot of stuff so there goes the food again ..i’m not criticising or blaming but just thanking for introducing me good food aand especially those food that are rare and expensive that i would never have enuff money to enjoy it for the time being…thank you very much, i’m seriously no regret in that…

PATHETIC

here she’s sitting here late at night again….it was quite a good day today when she was fantalizing her day with her special sumone so she decided to tell him how she really felt but she doesn’t have the courage yet to really express it out. how can everyone do it so ezily ? as though they do not need to care wat’s goin to happen eventually ?

she knows things will turned out to be good and she always hope and pray maybe sumday she’ll get wat she want, wat she desperate for she admits that she’s desperate espcecially when watching wat others have n she doesn’t. She wants to have tat experience

but the most pathetic thing just happened she’s here sitting,crying and in the same time doing the advising thing,pretended like nothing happened. Every word she typed, her tears rolled down from the corner of her eyes, down her cheek and eventually onto her blanket…………she’s there trying to act bold n strong tat nothing had really happened and starting to give advise as though she’s pro in those stuff. it’s torturing to tell wat he shud do to get back with a girl whose not a single percentage showing she’s tat girl…..she wanted to just curse him in the same time n really show him how she really felt tat time but he was just too dumb to even notice the difference in how she normally chats with him.

as she was crying with the soundtrack music " KIss goodbye" from the movie "the holiday" serenading her soul, her fingers run through the keyboard, searching the letter L …..O…….L and the "enter" button was hit.

the only song tat can only describe wat she is feelin rite now is leona lewis " keep bleeding" it’s as though she’s betrayed by her own feelings